


if you’re not in it (what’s gonna be left of the world)

by amsves



Series: the zero hour [3]
Category: Code Geass
Genre: Angst, Canonical Character Death, Character Death, Gen, Graphic Description of Corpses, Post-Zero Requiem
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-23
Updated: 2017-03-23
Packaged: 2018-10-09 17:11:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,790
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10417020
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amsves/pseuds/amsves
Summary: In the hours after the Zero Requiem, Nunnally and Suzaku are forced to come to terms with what the latter has done.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Title from "Good Grief" by Bastille.

Nunnally and Schneizel were freed from their chains and immediately evacuated to the nearest government building. As they were being unlocked and pushed into armored Knightmare Frames, Nunnally could see people laughing, crying, hugging, kissing, celebrating in the streets like they’d been freed from some terrible plague. And, to them, they had been.  
  
Nunnally wiped her tears with her newly-unshackled arms and sniffed. If only she could make them _understand_! In those final moments with her brother, she had seen it all, had come to know his plan and motives for what he’d done. She had to hand it to him; he was a genius. His plan had been carried out without a hitch. But no one would listen to her if she tried to explain that her brother wasn’t an evil dictator at all, but a loving and caring soul dedicated to protecting his sister at all costs. There was too much blood on his hands to ever reconcile him with the public.  
  
Nunnally’s escorts were a group of guards whom she had never seen before. They didn’t speak to her at all on the ride to the government building, which was fine with her. She really wasn’t in the mood to speak to anyone who would consider her brother a criminal, who would likely join the celebrations as soon as she had been taken care of.  
  
In record time they reached their destination, and Nunnally was being unloaded just as Schneizel arrived. They were escorted inside and given a change of clothes and water. The man in charge, an Honorary Britannian by the name of Hajimoto-san, explained that riots had started at the royal residence by small cells of terrorists in support of the late Emperor Lelouch. To go back would be dangerous, he told her, but she needn’t worry. Cornelia’s team would clear things up.  
  
And indeed, Cornelia made swift work of the fifty-odd ragtag rebels who supported her brother. In less than an hour, she and Schneizel were on their way back to the royal residence in Area Eleven. Cornelia greeted her by wrapping Nunnally up in her big, strong arms and squeezing her so tightly she could barely breathe. “I thought we might have lost you, too,” her older sister whispered. “That man is capable of killing anyone, even family. I’m just so glad you’re alright.”  
  
Nunnally didn’t speak. _That man is my brother!_ she wanted to shout. But she held her tongue. It wasn’t the time. Lelouch had, after all, killed Clovis, Charles, and, most notably, Euphemia, among countless others. Cornelia’s grief for her favorite sister clearly hadn’t subsided. Nunnally could only hope that Cornelia wouldn’t continue the slander of Lelouch’s name, though she knew in her heart that she would never, could never, be right about that. Lelouch’s atrocities had already nearly obscured Euphemia’s massacre from public memory. It was the least that she could do, in Cornelia’s opinion, to put her sister’s name at rest from the hateful public who didn’t understand that Euphie was just a girl.  
  
Geass, after all, was too dangerous a secret to make public. Euphemia would live forever in infamy for a crime she didn’t commit.  
  
After the siblings bathed, changed, and ate, Cornelia cleared her throat. “Nunnally,” she began gently, and reached out to grab her sister’s hand, “I know that this has affected you more than anyone. Lelouch may have been a demon to us, but he was a brother to you.”  
  
Nunnally nodded.  
  
“But,” her sister continued, “Lelouch has died. And, as he had no heir, you are next of kin. Therefore, Schneizel and I believe it proper to crown you our next Empress.”  
  
Nunnally wanted to scream. _I can’t lead an empire!_ But she didn’t. She took a deep breath. “I accept your request. We will make the announcement tomorrow.”  
  
Cornelia and Schneizel looked relieved. They must have thought that she would protest. Maybe they thought she would start crying and shouting at them that it was too early to move on, that they should take time to grieve. Maybe they thought she was in denial about her brother’s demise, though she couldn’t see how she could ever deny having seen her brother die in front of her.  
  
The image of her brother’s bloodied corpse sliding down the ramp to rest beside her in her chains, the sights he showed her as he lay bleeding out, his final words rasped in between haggard breaths—those things could never be denied.  
  
“There’s one more thing,” Scheizel started. “Zero—”  
  
Before he could finish, the doors to the dining room opened. Zero walked in.  
  
“—is to be your personal knight,” her brother finished. “It is the will of the people. He is their hero, after all.”  
  
“Both of you, please leave,” Nunnally ordered. “I wish to be alone with Zero for a moment. You may remain outside in the hall.”  
  
Cornelia looked like she wanted to protest, but didn’t. Schneizel stopped to bow in front of Zero before continuing after her.  
  
Nunnally and Zero were alone.  
  
“Suzaku,” Nunnally said. “It’s you, isn’t it, Suzaku? Take off your mask.”  
  
Zero looked shocked, but complied with her wishes. The mask came off, revealing a head of curly brown hair, followed by brilliant green eyes. Sure enough, this was Suzaku.  
  
So her visions hadn’t been wrong. Lelouch had really ordered Suzaku to hill him.  
  
Nunnally couldn’t stop her eyes from watering. “I just—” she clenched her fists, fingernails carving half-moons into her palms, “I just don’t understand. Why did you have to do it? Why did you kill my brother?”  
  
Suzaku, too, looked like he might be about to cry. “I’m so sorry, Nunnally. He ordered me to.”  
  
“You could have refused!” Composure be damned, Nunnally wanted to shout and scream and cry at the _unfairness_ of it all until her voice was gone. Who cared if her siblings heard? They knew about Geass already; they should know the truth about this as well. “I know he didn’t Geass you to make you do it! You accepted his wish! You slaughtered my brother, your friend, of your own free will!”  
  
“I had to!” Suzaku countered. “Nunnally, you have to understand. Remember your plan with Damocles? It was supposed to be a symbol of hatred. Lelouch had the exact same plan, but he wanted to use himself as the symbol. It was the only way he could atone for what he’d done.” He reached out to take her hand, but she jerked it away. “Please, Nunnally. It was the only way.”  
  
Nunnally looked at him for a long minute, before turning and leaving the dining room on the opposite side.  
  
The doors on this side led to more private guest quarters and such. Nunnally made her way down all three flights of stairs to the mausoleum underneath. It wasn’t intended to be a final resting place, but if something happened, like this, if a tragedy occurred in Area Eleven, a place to prepare and store the bodies of the nobility was a necessity.  
  
Nunnally crossed the large room to the coffin in the center. There he lay, her only full-blood sibling, arms crossed across his bloodied chest. His beautiful white robes were soiled with red. His fair skin was sallow, and his hair was a mess. Nunnally wanted to jerk her head away, wanted to run out of the room, wanted to return to her blindness so that at least she would never have to see her brother _like_ _this_.  
  
He was dead.  
  
And, yet, he almost didn’t look dead. Like if she squeezed his hand he would squeeze hers back. But that was absurd.  
  
She reached out and touched her brother’s hand anyway. It was cold.  
  
She didn’t try to stop the flow of tears, not this time.  
  
-  
  
Nunnally wasn’t sure how long she spent by herself in the mausoleum before the doors opened. She jerked away from her brother’s body as Suzaku entered the room. He removed his mask and walked towards her. “Nunnally,” he whispered, “May I have a moment alone with your brother?”  
  
She opened her mouth to refuse, but then he whispered, “Please, Nunnally,” and she understood. Suzaku was in just as much pain as she was. Maybe even more, since he was the one who dealt the blow.  
  
She nodded, and crossed the room towards the doors. “A minute, Zero, and not a second more.”  
  
Suzaku nodded, and the doors were closed.  
  
-  
  
Suzaku let himself begin to cry as soon as the doors were shut. He gripped tightly to his dear friend’s hand and let a gut-wrenching scream rip its way out of his throat. This hurt thousands of times more than he could have ever imagined it would. Lelouch, who had done so much to cause him pain during his life, continued to hurt him even after his death.  
  
At least Nunnally knew. Suzaku couldn’t imagine trying to act normal around her.  
  
He ran his fingers through Lelouch’s mussed hair in an attempt to detangle it, but his fingers wouldn’t pass through. The blood made the fine strands stick together.  
  
Sighing, he settled for smoothing his friend’s robes. Lelouch deserved to look nice in his death. He’d always looked nice while he was alive. His school uniform had always been neatly pressed, and his Emperor’s robes had been tastefully designed by Lelouch himself in an effort to blend the old, traditional style with one that was truly his own. The all-white theme, rather than the purple favored by his father, had made him look like a martyr, something Suzaku couldn't be sure was unintentional.  
  
Nothing Lelouch did was ever unintentional.  
  
Suzaku took one last, lingering look at Lelouch’s sallow face, before leaning down and pressing a quick kiss to his forehead. “It was an honor to serve as your night, Lelouch. I’ll see you on the other side.”  
  
The doors opened, and Nunnally entered. “The undertaker is here. She says we need to take our leave now so that she can prepare the body.”  
  
Suzaku nodded and donned his Zero mask. He walked out of the mausoleum, and followed behind Nunnally as they returned to the outside world.  
  
Only they would ever know the truth behind Lelouch’s actions. The rest of the world would hate him for all eternity. They had to be strong, in order to treasure and preserve his memory.  
  
If Suzaku noticed that Nunnally was still crying, he didn’t comment on it.  
  
If Nunnally resented Suzaku’s hand on her shoulder, she didn’t mention it.  
  
-  
  
 “Well then, Lelouch, let’s get you ready for your ‘burial,’ shall we?”  
  
The undertaker removed her cap, letting her long hair tumble down past her shoulders.  
  
“After all, there’s a house in Australia waiting for us.”

**Author's Note:**

> I read an analysis somewhere (which I can't find, or else I would link it here) that made me realize that when Nunnally shared Lelouch's visions during the Zero Requiem, she also would have realized that it was Suzaku who had just killed her brother.
> 
> in an early draft I had Nunnally running away from Suzaku until I remembered that she was in a wheelchair lol


End file.
